Let's admit it, reading negative stories everywhere on social media can be too much to take in. If the world didn't have women like these, it would have been a dull world.
Women are witty, sexy, bold and gorgeous. They have a sense of humor that can make anyone laugh, and they are unapologetically beautiful with their sarcastic comments. Here are some women who shared some of the funniest incidences on Twitter, and these tweets are worth reading, as it will definitely lighten up your day. Let's admit it, reading negative stories everywhere on social media can be too much to take in. If the world didn't have women like these, it would have been a dull world. Some of these are just accurate with their sarcasm and they are witty as hell.
didnt have my glasses walking across campus & thought i saw my bf but then i thought no hes at work so i didn't say anything & at that exact moment my bf was walking with his boss & says "thats my gf but shes not wearing glasses watch her not even recognize me" & yk he was right— hannah (@gulickhannah) October 9, 2018
Ladies, if you think it’s okay to wear a shirt without a bra and I can see your whole ass nipples......you’d be correct that shits fire please keep doing that— mayana (@mayanakatherine) September 3, 2018
If you're arguing loudly on your phone in public, please put it on speaker. I need to hear both sides of the story to know who's side I am on.— Göld E Löx 🍒 (@StephiHill) December 27, 2018
I went to lunch with friends and saw my husband at the restaurant. I was going to say his name but he was staring at his phone so I watched him.— Lady Lawya (@Parkerlawyer) April 24, 2019
He was smiling.
Then my phone dinged. And it was a video he forwarded of a dog wrestling a water hose. This is love.
I waved to a man because I thought he waved at me. Apparently he waved to an other woman. So to get out of the awkward situation I kept my hand up and a taxi pulled over and drove me to the airport. I am now in Poland starting a new life.— Just Sally (@MustardSally1) April 8, 2019
i love when pets just make up Rules and their humans are like “oh, fine.” my cat has a bedtime & he won’t go to sleep until we do. every night at 10:30 he starts trying to herd us up the stairs. & now we, two grown ass humans, adhere to the bedtime of a 12 pound cat.— Rebecca Mix (@rebeccarmix) April 21, 2019
Told my Dad I ran out of alcohol and didn’t have any money to buy any for the weekend..so he gave me the huge bottle of vodka from the cupboard that I stole and replaced with water when I was 16... life really does come back to bite u in the ass— lizzie (@lizbeth_ellen) March 24, 2019
Dear Amazon, I bought a toilet seat because I needed one. Necessity, not desire. I do not collect them. I am not a toilet seat addict. No matter how temptingly you email me, I'm not going to think, oh go on then, just one more toilet seat, I'll treat myself.— Jac Rayner (@GirlFromBlupo) April 6, 2018
My dad just called and said “I see you, last one to papas pizza loses.” He’s going 90 in a 55, gets pulled over. I’m dying bc he’s gonna get a ticket and I’m gonna win. Next thing I know this man flys by me and is getting a POLICE ESCORT TO PAPPAS PIZZA.. I’m so done.— Victoria Lauren (@VL_Archer) September 28, 2018
LAUNDRY:— Marijuana Mama🕊 (@marijuana_mom) March 26, 2019
Washing - 30 minutes
Drying - 60 minutes
Putting away - 7 to 10 business days
I live in a small town. Someone called my mom and told her they saw me trying to buy alcohol at the grocery store. I’m 41.— My mouth runs 24/7 (@redheadedhuzzy) March 23, 2019
A German man just came into the pub and tried to ask for cutlery but ended up saying "I need some food weapons" and I will now be referring to them by nothing else— Sophuckingoode (@SophieRachael95) April 8, 2019
ppl who get periods should not have to work on days 1 & 2. thank you for coming to my ted talk.— claire schwartz (@23cschwartz) November 1, 2018
today my roommate said, “I’m gonna go nap. I’m not tired. I just don’t want to be awake” and I...felt that— jen merritt!!! (@jennifermerr) April 22, 2019
If you pay me $50 I'll show up to your funeral but stand really far away, holding a black umbrella regardless of the weather, so that people think you died with a dark and interesting secret.— Dana Schwartz (@DanaSchwartzzz) January 3, 2019
at the gym i said subscription instead of membership and the girl replied with 'lol this isnt a pharmacy'. bitch thats a prescription were both stupid— - (@59912111a) August 15, 2018
Just watched a man bringing home a goldfish on the train accidentally pop the bag- fish flops onto the floor. 3 people swarm to save him (the fish not the man). Guy chugs the last of his coffee and throws the fish in his cup. Lady next to him empties in her bottle of water.— Hannah Baxter (@Isapalindrome) April 17, 2019
I took 11 shots of tequila in about 4 hours once. I woke up on the front lawn of my parents’ house the next day. I lived 150 miles away. Apparently a cab driver asked for my address and I gave him theirs. My dad paid the $400 fare and left me in the yard. https://t.co/YVBkaR5soJ— Just Angie (@HoustonAngie) September 10, 2018
So many people I know are pregnant what the fuck is in the air 😒😖😖😖— Mpho (@PhopsTheko_) March 20, 2018
*in target*— 🗣bree (@ayobreezus) February 2, 2019
little girl in checkout line: I’m gonna see a cow today!
me: wooow that sounds so cool!
mom of girl: please ignore her she’s trying to say her grandma but she heard me call her a cow today and she won’t stop repeating it